😭 This wedding speech made me sob

Weddings make me cry, but I was NOT expecting the water works like this. 😭

I just got back from a wedding in California, a trip that doubled as a getaway vacation for my husband and I. What a gift!

At the dinner, the usual toasts were made; parents of the bride, parents of the groom, maid of honor, and friend of honor. And I gotta say, everyone NAILED their speeches. It was a theatre person wedding after all, but even the parents gave toasts that were more like short skits in honor of the bride and groom. I was laughing, I was crying, I was taken on a JOURNEY!

The last speech of the night was from the groom's friend of honor, a best friend from high school who now lives abroad as a theatre and film director.

Ya'll, when I say her speech did me in. It did me in. Not a trace of mascara left at this point.

She shared how the groom's simple kindness and friendship as a junior in high school changed her entire life. It kept her from transferring back to a school with less arts funding, which meant she pursued a theatre degree in college. Which meant she had the confidence to pursue an MFA in directing, which led her to a career abroad and introduced her to her now-husband.

I was so moved by her story. I was touched by their friendship and what that made possible in her life. It made me think of all the small ways people's kindness has affected me and made things possible in my life. I get choked up thinking about it as I type!

Cynthia and I have been talking for years about the unexpected ways relationships play out in our personal and professional lives (this episode on how to network and not feel icky about it is a good place to start). The simple fact is, just as much as we need the kindnesses of others, being kind and generous and empathetic people ourselves is even more necessary!

Here's a few other things this speech made me think about in the days since:

1. Everyone wants to belong. Especially as an adult, making new friends can feel scary at worst and awkward at best. But everyone wants connection and friendship! It's worth it to make the first invitation. I've moved cities three times over the past four years, which has meant leaving dear friendships and needing to forge new ones. I'm always pleasantly surprised when my awkward first invites are met with enthusiasm and gratitude. (I talked about this on TikTok recently.)

2. Especially if you're in any kind of leadership position: Don't make people feel stupid for what they don't know. As I've grown into my role as a teacher and coach, and as more people look to me as an "expert," I've realized time and time again that I have the greatest influence for good when I meet people where they're at and don't make them feel dumb for what they don't know. Trying to appear smarter or more experienced by minimizing the experiences of others is NOT ok. In the world of theatre where are there are often natural hierarchies that exist (director and actor, teacher and student, conductor and musician, drama club president and new kid in school), it is actually more important to be kind, empathetic, and not assume you know everything about everything. (Related to this: on my TBR list is this book my mom keeps recommending me called "Think Again" by Adam Grant.)

Essentially, don't be the worst person you know at an audition. Or in any situation, really. Instead, be generous, be kind, and make friends. I promise, it's our relationships in life that last and that lead to our greatest fulfillment.

If you've got a friendship or act of kindness that has impacted your life in some way... I'd love to hear about it, just hit reply ❤️

Much love!

-Chelsea